Against the Grain
by xSuchSweetNothingx
Summary: Everyone is half of a whole, and on the day of your sixteenth birthday you find your other half, and your life changes dramatically after that. I would love to give the genius that came up with that idea a piece of my mind . . . AU. Edward x Bella. High School. Mature Language and eventual Lemons. Drabble.
1. Sixteenth Birthday

**Sixteenth Birthday**

* * *

"Today is the first day of the rest of my life," I say to myself in the mirror.

That sounds just as stupid as I knew it would.

I sigh, reaching up to push my hair out of my face.

I stand up a little straighter.

I pull my shoulders back.

I force a huge smile at my reflection.

And then I slouch back down and frown.

This is the day that every teenager looks forward to.

Their sixteenth birthday.

It comes with a touch of freedom, a dash of rebellion, a pinch of drama, and a lot of love.

It's the definition of temptation for people of all ages.

But I know better.

And whoever I'm _meant_ for . . . well, they're in for a world of disappointment.

Because I'm not going to give up my freedom just because some _boy_ thinks I belong to him; that I'm his other half.

I am owned only by myself (and my parents until I turn eighteen).

And I could never love someone who tried to take that away from me.

* * *

_This idea popped into my head at the strangest time._

_I always come up with things in weird places, but never before while I was working._

_I'm excited to see where it goes._

_:)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	2. Thrilled

**Thrilled**

* * *

Mom has already made breakfast by the time I walk down the stairs, and Dad is sitting at the island counter eating it.

"Good morning, birthday girl," she beams at me, placing two pieces of bacon on my plate.

I drop my schoolbag on the floor and hop up onto the stool, groaning, "Morning."

"What's wrong, Bells?" Dad asks through a mouth full of scrambled eggs, ruffling my hair.

I can't tell them; they won't understand.

They're a happily _mated_ couple.

Ugh.

"Just tired."

He grunts in understanding.

"Aren't you excited?" Mom asks, twirling her hair around her finger like _she's_ the teenager in the room.

"Thrilled."

_Not._

Dad stands up, going around to give Mom a kiss and say goodbye before leaving for work.

She shifts uncomfortably, "Bella?"

"Yes, Mom?"

She doesn't answer for several moments, "I know that you're unhappy with the way things are -"

"What gave me away?" I ask sarcastically, cutting her off.

She ignores that, continuing what she was going to say, "But go easy on him, okay?"

I look up at her in question.

"Whether you like it or not, you are going to feel a pull to him, and it's going to grow more painful the longer you resist it. And the pain is going to be ten times worse for him, not to mention the pain of your rejection."

I don't have time to ask her what she means before I hear the school bus pull up outside.

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	3. Second Thought

**Second Thought**

* * *

"Good morning, Bella," Mr. Bill greets me with a wrinkled smile when I get on the bus, holding a Starbucks bag out to me.

"Morning," I reply, forcing a smile. Despite the fact that my day is sure to be a crappy one, I can't help but be kind to him. Mr. Bill might be the kindest person I've ever met.

And the fact that he often shares his food may or may not contribute to that idea.

Being the first person to get on the bus in the morning has to have some kind of upside to it.

I sit down in the seat behind him so we can talk.

I'm not interested in interacting with any of the other assholes on this bus.

I reach in the bag and take out the chocolate muffin he got for me and take a big bite.

"So," he starts, "How are you feeling now that the dreaded day is finally here?"

I sigh, holding a hand in front of my full mouth as I reply, "Surprisingly well, thank you."

"What's the worst that could happen?" Mr. Bill asks.

"Me having to wake up to Newton's face every morning . . . with a feeling of _happiness_ running through me," I answer, shivering at the thought.

That might be the worst thing about this whole 'pre-set mates' idea; the fact that I could go from hating someone so intensely to not being able to live without them in a day's time.

"Well, do you feel a burning in your stomach right now?" he inquires, raising an eyebrow at me through the rearview mirror.

"No."

"Then it's not him, so your day can only get better from here," he smiles cheekily.

"How do you know?"

"Whenever you are near your mate, an intense burning fills your stomach. And we are almost to Michael's stop now," he says.

I look around the bus, noticing now that it is nearly full, and I ignore Mike as he boards the bus, eagerly waving his hand in my face before moving to the back of the bus to sit with his friends.

I chew on my thumb nail for a moment, the question that has been brewing since I last spoke to my mother filling my mind. "Mr. Bill?"

"Yes, Bella?" he looks at me in the rearview mirror again.

"What will happen if I . . . well, you know, reject my mate. Like . . . if I refuse to spend time with him or whatever?" I watch his features closely.

"You can always take things slow, you know. Not every relationship takes the same course –"

"Mr. Bill," I interrupt him, "Please just answer the question."

He sighs, stopping the bus in front of Forks High. He waits to answer my question until every other student is off the bus. "Are you asking what will happen to you, or what will happen to him?"

If I'm the one rejecting him, why would I be hurt?

It doesn't even make sense for me to ask that question.

My brows furrow, "Him. Why, will something happen to me?" If I'm the one rejecting him, why would I be hurt?

"Bella," Mr. Bill begins, "If you are worried that he might suffer, and you haven't even met him yet . . . this man who you are so sure that you will have no feelings for what so ever . . . then maybe you should give a second thought to whether or not you want to put yourself through so much trouble to stop the process."

"That doesn't answer my question," I murmur weakly.

"Maybe not . . . but it did answer mine."

My brows furrow, "What question?"

"The one that I'll be asking you tomorrow morning . . . just as I do every other," he says before nodding to the open doors of the school bus, "You'd best be on your way now. The first bell is about to ring."

* * *

**_A/N: _**_I decided to take off the last couple of chapters . . . they were too choppy. I'll try to get one or two more chapters out tonight to make up for them though. :)_

_Let me know what you think of my version of Billy._

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	4. Fish

**Fish**

* * *

The second that I'd stepped foot into school I understood what everyone had meant when they said the word _pain_.

Only pain wasn't the right word; in fact there aren't words to describe this torture.

I hadn't even noticed that I'd keeled over in the middle of the hallway until the security guard came out of his office and asked me if I was alright.

"Does it _look like I'm alright_," I'd forced out, looking up at him through squinted eyes.

The asshole even had the audacity to chuckle.

Then he walked away.

Just walked away, mumbling something about 'the good old days'.

What kind of security _guard _does that? I could have been dying of a shot wound! He didn't even stay long enough to check for blood on the front of my t-shirt!

Anyway, as soon I could think straight, I went to my locker.

That was the past four and a half minutes.

Now I'm in homeroom.

"How do you feel?" Jessica, who I really only tolerate because she's friends with my friend, asks.

"Why do people keep asking me that?"

"Because it's a valid question; aren't you the least bit excited to meet the love of your life?" she inquires though her face resembles that of one who is gazing off into the sunset.

"No."

"Come on," she urges.

"Nope."

"Not even just a little bit?"

"Not even as much as I care to have this conversation."

She laughs, "You're funny, Swan."

I roll my eyes, "Yeah, you, too, Skantley."

"It's Stanley," she corrects dryly.

"That's what I said," I say, waving my hand uncaringly.

Jessica sighs heavily, "Seriously, though. It could be worse," when I don't press for more information she continues, "At least you're not a guy. They have to wait until their mate turns sixteen to be found! At least since we're girls we know that we'll find our true mate on our sixteenth birthday."

I blatantly ignore her.

"Without the mating process . . . some might never meet their soul mates. They might die alone, or even live their life with someone who isn't right for them. Someone who might hurt them."

I continue to ignore her as she rambles on.

"Bella."

She must have realized that I don't care.

_Think about fish._

"Bella."

_Fish can swim away from other fish they don't like without seeming rude._

"_Bella_."

_Because they're fish._

"Bella!"

_And that's what fish do._

"**Bella!**"

"What do you want, Smantley," I snap.

"It's Stanely!" she snaps back.

"That's what I said!" I yell back in chorus with the bell that signals for first period. I quickly shift my features into a friendly smile, "Great chat; let's do it again sometime!" I chirp, quickly gathering my books and walking out the door.

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	5. Intense

**Intense**

* * *

I'm halfway to my first class of the day before the pain in my stomach flares up again, only this time it's even worse than before.

Someone trips over my foot in my hunched state.

"Are you all right?" a deep voice asks.

"Yeah thanks," I reply, looking up to see who'd asked the question.

It's a guy that I've never spoken to before, and he's not talking to me. He's talking to the girl that tripped.

Who is most likely his _mate_.

"Not you; what the fuck are you doing in the middle of the hallway?" he hisses, helping his mate stand before moving to stand in front of her.

My jaw drops, "Now wait just a second there, dickwad! I'm suffering through something a little worse than a three foot fall and you have the nerve to freak out on me? She's fine!"

His girlfriend peeks around from behind him to apologize, "I'm so sorry, Bella," she says, and I recognize her. Irina from Biology. "We're still in the beginning stages . . . he's a little overprotective."

"I'll say . . ." I mutter, "But what the fuck does that mean? Is everyone like this right after they mate?"

"This is Bella?" dickwad interrupts, "The one who you were talking about yesterday?"

She nods, and I have to stop myself from asking what she was saying about me.

She was probably just talking shit.

"Go to class, Laurent; you're going to be late. I'm good here," she says pushing him towards the classroom to our right.

"But –"

"Go," she insists.

He glares at me for a moment before pressing his lips to her forehead and leaving.

The bell rings.

"Where are you headed?" she asks.

"203."

"I'll walk with you," she says, stepping in the direction of my next class.

I try to follow her but am stopped again by the searing pain.

"Does it hurt?" she asks excitedly.

What the fuck is wrong with this bitch? "Yes it fucking hurts; how do I make it stop?"

She ignores me, looking from the door to my left to the door to my right before locking back at the door to my left. And then doing it again. And again. And again.

I'm about to knock the bitch out when she says, "That means he's close. He's in one of these classrooms. Go ahead and look in them."

"No thanks. I'm not really in the mood to get detention today." Disrupting class, as I well know, is not tolerated at all in this school. My record of twenty two detentions in the past two years has taught me this. "We're only in the second week of school. Rebellion comes later."

"The teachers won't mind," she insists, "They'll understand."

"Thanks again, but no."

"It's the only way to make it stop."

"Then I guess I'll just have to deal."

Irina glares heavily at me.

My eyes narrow as she stalks to the door to my left.

"Just look," she demands, grabbing the door knob.

"No."

"Why are you so stubborn?"

"Why do you even fucking care? You don't know me," I snap.

"The pain could stop," she tries to tempt me.

"So could the sound coming from your fucking throat but that _clearly_ isn't going to happen, either."

She cocks her hip, her fists resting on them. "Do I ever bother you, Bella?"

"Not usually, but you're certainly making up for it now," I spit, mirroring her stance.

"I'm trying to help you out here."

"Well stop."

She turns the knob and the door starts to open. "Just take a peek."

I shake my head, crossing my arms across my chest.

She rolls her eyes, "Bella."

"Irina," I say, warning lacing my tone.

Irina turns and puts her head inside the door, "Mr. Marcus, do you mind if my friend Bella comes in for a minute. She senses that her mate is near and it's making it difficult for her to function."

I take off down the hallway before I can hear his reply, the pain intensifying to the point where, when I do finally get outside of the door of my class, I have to lift up my shirt a bit and check that there isn't a gaping hole in my stomach.

* * *

_**A/N: **A lot of you have questioned if my updates are going to be more regular now, or if I have a set update day. _

_The answer is: yes and no._

_Sage, my writing partner, and I have been having difficulties communicating lately. She's having issues with her husband and school and I've got family drama. That being said . . . It's been difficult lately to make the time (or summon the creativity) to write, but now that things are settled down in my life I should be able to update this particular story more regularly, though I will not set a specific day that I will update._

_I try to do that a lot of times . . . but I get so excited about every chapter I write that I don't end up waiting to post it, and then life happens and I don't have time to update on the actual day I was supposed to update on._

_If you read my story "The Devil's Creation" though, I'm sorry to say that it will not be updated until Sage can find the time in her bust life to help me, seeing as we co-write that story._

_This one is all mine though, so I declare that it will suffer no longer!_

_And I am aware of how lame that was._

_Love you all; oh, and just a little hint . . . the more reviews I get, the more I want to update ;)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	6. Reservation

**Reservation**

* * *

Thank god I didn't just run away from an almost meeting with my _mate _for the sole reason of avoiding detention.

Because I ended up getting detention anyway, for being late to class.

My first detention of the year. And we've only been back to school for eight days.

Not even eight days, because we got two days off for Rosh Hashanah.

If _I _were superintendent, I would have done the smart thing and not started until after the holiday.

I mean come on; it's only two days!

Leah constantly clicking her pen finally gets to me and I snap. "Do you fucking mind?"

She scowls, "What's _your_ problem?"

Leah is a transfer student from a reservation not to far from here.

Her, her mother and her brother were all kicked off once her father died; nobody really knows why.

I think that her mother killed her father, but then again I always find the worst in people so it could just be all in my head.

_Maybe I shouldn't have snapped at her . . ._

"Have you ever woken up one morning, knowing that it was going to be the worst day of your life?" I seethe, deciding that I'm not overly concerned with my life right now. "Because that's me today."

Her face clears, "Isn't today your birthday?"

Now I scowl.

"You're not happy," she observes.

"I hide it well," I say sarcastically.

She chuckles. "At least you know that the person you find is always going to love you. Nothing is guaranteed when you're born from those of the res."

That's right; how could I have forgotten?

The people that live on the reservation don't have the gene in them that causes them to mate the way we do.

They have a choice.

And that's the reason as to why everyone hates her and her brother Seth. Because their future is not determined by their genes.

That's not why I hate her though.

"You don't realize what a curse that is."

"What could possibly be wrong with knowing? With not having to go on dates to figure out if you're meant to be? With not having to lose feelings for one another? With never feeling rejection?"

A laugh quietly, keeping my eyes on the oblivious teacher as I reply, "You don't get to experience everything that the world and all the people in it have to offer. Your main concern is always that one, single person that your body says you need."

* * *

_**A/N: **Just so you know, I'm basing this story on the idea that this is all happening on September 13 (Bella's birthday) of this year. Which is a Friday, but will not include any special 'Friday the 13th' pranks.  
_

_Don't forget to review :)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	7. Sergeant

**Sergeant**

* * *

Surprisingly, second and third period went by pretty smoothly; aside from the varying degrees of stomach pain, that is.

Fourth period is gym.

"God I hate this fucking class," Lauren sighs, picking at her nails and I laugh in agreement.

Let me explain something.

I'm am going to make it as clear as I possibly can.

You don't understand the _meaning_ of the phrase 'death wish' until you've had _this particular_ fourth period gym.

Let me spell it out.

Caius Volturi is the gym teacher, though from how seriously he takes his job you would think he's a drill sergeant. A warm up to him is a five minute mile, and stretches are advanced yoga.

Game.

Is.

War.

The only good thing about him is that he's not treating me differently just because I'm going to meet my mate today.

Even without him, though, fourth period would suck; mainly due to three people.

Emmett McCarty.

Edward Masen.

And Jasper Whitlock.

Each one of them can be characterized as, '_That guy _who is under the impression that gym class is Olympic training'.

I can't even tell you how many times I've gotten into screaming matches with them over me dropping or missing a ball.

Assholes.

And not only are they _assholes_, but they are also _asses_.

Just in case you don't know the difference: An asshole is a person who is mean to others without being provoked - a bully if you will. An ass, on the other hand, is a person who consistently makes a fool out of themself while trying to make others laugh.

Thankfully, I get a few minutes of the period _without _their presence, as they always take their sweet time in the locker rooms.

Which I'm staring at right now as I'm seated in my quad.

"What do you think we're going to do today?" Lauren asks.

I shrug, "Something that should be illegal for a Junior gym class teacher to make us do."

"Like every other day," she replies.

We wave to Angela when we see her walk out of the locker room.

She takes her sweet time, too, but it's okay for her to take her time because her arm is broken.

Sergeant Volturi doesn't care; he's seen men who don't even _have_ arms take down opponents.

"Move along, Angela; I don't have all day," he snaps at her as she walks past him, causing her to blush and quicken her pace.

"Psycho," I say.

"Douche," Lauren agrees.

Angela sits down next to me and I rub her arm. "Can you imagine what he's like when he's angry?" I ask.

"He's only going to get worse and worse throughout the year, too," she replies.

Our conversation dies as the boys locker room door opens.

Everyone except for three people are out here.

And they always make a difference.

Jasper Hale comes running out, his head turned so he's looking back the door he just came through.

Nothing good can come of this.

I turn away so that I don't have to watch what's coming.

"Give it to me, Edward!" Jasper exclaims, trying to mimic a moaning girl.

Both Angela's and Lauren's eyes widen, but before I can turn to see what they're looking at something slams into my head.

Hard.

I see stars.

* * *

_**A/N: **I know I don't have to remind you to review . . . I just want to let you know that if I get ten reviews tonight, combined from these past two chapters, I'll post another chapter tonight.  
_

_And you know that I know that you know that I know that you want to see what happens when she and Edward are face to face._

_;)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	8. Fuck

**Fuck**

* * *

"Oh my god, Bella! Are you alright?"

Angela?

"Hey asshole! Watch where you're throwing your balls!"

Lauren?

"I almost had it; it wasn't on purpose."

That's Jasper.

"Oh you wish you had a chance at getting up close and personal with my balls."

Huh?

I groan, moving my hand up to touch my forehead.

"Swan?"

The same voice as before.

I've never heard it before today.

It's like . . . ice cream melting . . . rain in the spring . . . a river in the desert . . . a light in the dark . . .

"Hmm?" I moan, trying desperately to open my eyes, to see who that voice belongs to.

Someone touches me and warmth floods my entire being.

My eyes open to emeralds, and the ever present pain in my stomach fades.

The owner of the emeralds gasps, and his arms encircle me.

"You," he whispers.

"Ugh," Lauren gags, "Him? Really?"

I blink.

Once.

Twice.

And my head is clear.

And pounding - god damn my head is pounding.

"Masen," I hiss and nauseousness hits me as soon as the word leaves my mouth.

No. Not the word.

My tone. My tone and who it's directed to.

I'm not supposed to speak to him that way; it doesn't make sense.

_You're not his,_ I remind myself, _you can say whatever you want, to whoever you want_.

"Let go of me," I say, but I can tell it doesn't register with him, so I say it again, "Seriously, get off."

I'm pushing at his chest.

With one hand. The other is clutching his shirt.

I fix that and start pushing him away from me with both.

"What?" he's dumbfounded. "Why? Are you ok?"

"No I'm not fucking okay," I growl, looking down to identify the object that hit me, "You kicked a soccer ball at my head!"

"I'm so sorry; I never meant to hit you. I'll take you to the nurse," he assures, taking a step in the direction of the nurse.

His movement causes me to shift in his arms and suddenly my ear is next to his heart.

My eyes close of their own accord to listen to the melody of his life.

And then I remember myself again. "No you won't; you're going to put me down."

And he does.

But only because he's . . .

Because he's my mate.

And as my mate, his instincts tell him to do what I want.

But the second he does the aching in my stomach returns and I want to throw myself at him instantly.

The creases in his forehead and the fact that his arms are still outstretched towards me tells me that he feels the same.

"Now . . ." I give myself a short, mental reminder as to why I'm going to say what I'm about to say, ". . . Never touch me again."

His face breaks.

I turn so that I don't have to see it. "Lauren, can you take me to the nurse?"

She nods cautiously, clearly looking at the boy behind me as she comes forward to walk me to the nurse.

"Where do you think you're going? Acting like you're dying from a sissy would . . ." Mr. Volturi is cut off by Masen.

"Fuck off!" It's defensive.

I can't tell if it's aimed towards the teacher or maybe his friends who are surely in the middle of consoling him.

Why? Because he was just rejected by his mate.

_Fuck_.

I just mated with Edward Masen.

* * *

_**A/N: **You came through with the reviews so here you go!  
_

_You have to let me know what you think._

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	9. Vertigo

**Vertigo**

* * *

Vertigo hits me as soon as the doors close behind me.

I'm falling, and then I'm on the ground.

"Oh my god; Bella!" Lauren gasps, and I feel her hands pulling on my own to help me up.

I wince as my eyes open to the spinning hallway.

The doors open behind us, and the dimming pain in my stomach alerts me to who it is.

Do I want him to help me?

Yes.

Do I want to think about how me wanting anything from him makes me feel?

No.

"Go _away,_" I groan, rubbing my forehead.

_Could this day get any worse?_

"Just let me help you to the nurse's office," Masen insists.

"Absolutely not."

"Lauren can come, too."

"Thanks for your permission," I spit in his direction, trying to open my eyes so that I can glare at him again.

"I'll leave as soon as you're in," he promises.

"You'll leave _now_."

"I'm the one who did this; I'm kind of obligated to help you," he reasons.

"You wouldn't have _before_." And he knows exactly what I mean by before.

"You don't know that."

"Just _go away_."

"Bella," Lauren interrupts, and my eyes finally open. "I don't think I can _carry _you to the nurse."

I sigh.

I rub my temples.

_I guess it's not really a big deal. It's just a lift to the nurse's office._

And then I turn to Masen. "Fine."

He smirks.

And just like that I hate him again.

_Smug bastard._

I scowl, "Forget it," and stalk away in the direction of the nurse's office.

* * *

_**A/N: **I'm glad that most of you enjoyed chapter eight!_

_A few of you have asked if males feel the effects of mating more strongly than the females and the answer to that is: yes! And you'll find out soon just how strong the male's connection to the female is. To give you a very vague hint . . . it's heightened. A lot._

_Don't forget to follow, favorite and review!_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	10. Attitude Adjustment

**Attitude Adjustment**

* * *

My entrance into the nurse's office is less than graceful.

To be more specific . . . the first thing that touches the ground is my head.

"Oh dear!" Mrs. Cope exclaims, quickly standing from her desk to come and help me stand.

_Good going, Bella!_

Now my head hurts even worse.

_Would it have killed you to let Edward carry you here?_

I ignore the more intelligent part of myself, deciding instead to focus on telling Mrs. Cope why I'm here. "Someone kicked a soccer ball into my head during gym."

"Let's get some ice on that right away," she says, leading me to sit down on a cot. "Should I be expecting a frantic mate to come through those doors?" she inquires expectedly.

I chuckle with depression, "Nothing is for sure with him, but I told him not to."

She frowns, "It would have been better for him to come along; he might start a fight with whoever did this to you. " She hands me a surprisingly soft ice pack before going back to her desk, "I should probably call him to the office as to avoid a fight."

"You don't have to worry about that," I assure her.

"Why do you say that?"

"Because he's the one who did it."

Her jaw drops, "Oh my – he must feel terrible! Of course you know that, surely, it was an accident."

I don't respond.

She observes me for a minute. Then, cautiously she asks, "Would you like to talk about it?"

I sigh, "Not really."

She nods. A minute passes before she murmurs, "Do you mind if I tell you something?"

I wave my hand, "Sure."

"Now, I don't know you personally, so what I'm about to say _could_ be completely irrelevant, but . . . I assume you are still early on in your mating, is that right?" She continues when I nod, "It is definitely an adjustment; in the beginning, when I first mated with my husband . . . I'd known him as a bully. He'd picked on me since grade school; made me feel terrible. And while mating doesn't change the person . . . it can change their attitude."

"What does that mean?" I ask.

She smiles softly. "Mating is a very complex event."

_I've heard that before._

"Feelings you've never felt before; feelings that are unprovoked by any obvious thing, other than what you've been told by others."

"Everybody knows that it's caused by a gene in the X chromosome."

"This is true," she nods, "But it's more than that. Think about it – females have two chromosomes, each with an equal amount of this particular gene. This gives us balance."

"Ok," I say, still not understanding.

_Where is she going with this?_

"Males only have one X chromosome, with _twice _the amount of the gene that their mate has. This causes them to feel the connection on a higher level; something that you and I, or any other female, will never understand."

"What does that have to do with an attitude adjustment?"

She pulls a packet out of her desk, still smiling, and walks over to me, "Anything that you need to know is in this packet." She places it in my empty hand.

I groan, "Can't you just tell me?"

"It's not easy to explain."

"Well, you've clearly memorized that packet – just paraphrase," I insist.

She takes a moment to gather her thoughts. "Imagine having to experience your own struggles, while feeling the weight of another's at the same time. And that weight is so foreign that you just can't take your mind off of it; it has to be lifted."

"So," I start, "He, what? Can feel my emotions?"

"And your pain, your desires, your fears, your aspirations –"

"I'm still not getting it."

"And it becomes more important to him than his own. When you're hurt, he needs to take your pain away, because it is his own. When you're sad, he needs to make you happy, because he will suffer along with you. When you're happy, he needs you to share it with him, because he's the only one who truly understands _exactly_ how you're feeling."

I don't know what to say to that.

"So, whatever old feelings that you have for him that still reside . . . just know – while _he, _as a person, will always be the same . . . it is both physically and mentally impossible for him to leave you alone – regardless of whether you want him to or not."

"Well," I gesture towards the door, "He hasn't showed up, yet."

Mrs. Cope chuckles, shaking her head, "First and foremost, your mate will listen to your words to appease you. Second, he will listen to your heart."

Why did she have to make it sound so nice and romantic?

"I'll give you some Advil and then you'd better head to your next class; I think you'll be alright," she dismisses me.

_Why did that feel more like a session with a therapist than a nurse tending to my wounds?_

* * *

_**A/N: **This chapter should have helped you understand more how Edward (and males in general) are effected by the mating process._

_Now . . . what challenge must you overcome for me to post another chapter tonight?_

_Hm . . . I'm thinking that ten reviews (again) should do it - that shouldn't be a problem for you guys though. You accomplished it with flying colors last time :)_

_Don't get used to me going so easy on you again ;)_

_Love you!_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	11. Distress

**Distress**

* * *

Fifth period is Biology.

Which means I'm going to have to face Irina.

I groan inwardly at the thought.

Hopefully Mr. Banner won't have us do a lab today so that she won't be able to talk to me.

During regular class, she sits on the complete opposite side of the classroom as me, but we're lab partners.

My distress is completely erased - where Irina is concerned - when I open the door.

Now . . . I know that I might be crazy . . . but I'm pretty sure - no, I'm _positive _that Masen has _never_ been in my Biology class.

And I know for sure that the seat next to me has always been empty.

The one that he's currently occupying.

I see red.

"_What_ exactly is it that you think _you're doing_?" I hiss in his smirking face, not even remembering walking across the room.

"I transferred into your Biology class."

I don't just see red. I taste it.

But that might just be the blood coming from my lip from me biting it so hard.

"I _told you _to stay _away_ from me," I remind him.

"You know that I can't do that," he says seriously before smirking once again, "And you and I both know that some part of you doesn't want that at all."

"You don't know me."

"Actually . . . I think I do," he assures me, "I probably know you better than anyone else ever has . . . or will."

Should I punch him in the face?

I should punch him in the face.

"You don't really want to do that," he says, shaking his head, "It will only end up making you feel worse."

_He's probably right._

And _that_ thought _really_ makes me want to punch _myself_ in the face.

"And you definitely don't want to do that."

"What the fuck! Can you like, read my mind, or something?" I exclaim, throwing my hands up in my frustration.

He smiles cheekily, "Might as well."

"Alright, class," Mr. Banner calls our attention, "Everyone take your seat. We're going to be taking notes today."

And suddenly a lab with Irina doesn't seem so bad.

* * *

_**A/N: **You went above and beyond as per usual, my friends.  
_

_But if you want another update tonight . . . well, I'm getting tired so I'm going to have to raise the bar._

_Ten favorites._

_Let's see what you guys can do._

_;)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	12. Detention

**Detention**

* * *

"All of you will be very excited for today's lesson . . . Mitosis!" Mr. Banner exclaims excitedly while using a remote to turn on the projector.

Trying to ignore . . . the student to my left, I quickly open my notebook and grab my pencil, scribbling _'Mitosis' _at the top of the page and writing down today's date.

"Now, can anyone tell me what mitosis is?" the teacher inquires.

I raise my hand.

"Ah, Mr. Masen. Please enlighten us."

I frown as he answers the question.

"Very good." He clicks the remote again and the slide changes to one with the definition of _'Mitosis'_.

I copy the slide.

"Why are you copying that if you already know the definition?"

I drop the pencil and turn to stare at him.

"What?" He's honestly surprised.

"Are you serious?"

"_What?_"

"Are you really going to tell me how to _be a student_?" I hiss as quietly as I can manage.

He rolls his gorgeous green - I mean eyes. "I wasn't telling you anything; I was simply asking you a question."

"I thought you knew me better than anyone else ever has . . . _or will,_" I say snidely.

"I do," he assures me, "But that doesn't mean there aren't some things that I still don't know."

"I'll say," I remark.

His brows furrow.

He's obviously taken offense to that.

Good.

"What's _that _supposed to mean?"

"It means that you've taken stalking - not to mention doing the _exact opposite _of what I want - to a whole other level."

"Look, I don't want to fight with you," he whispers, moving closer to me.

"What exactly _do _you want?" I ask.

He runs his hand through his already messy hair, leaning back in his seat.

He's really not that bad looking.

His hair is a mess, but it kind of works for him. And he's got those stunning green eyes. And that crooked smile. And he's really tall. But not the lanky kind; he's pretty muscular.

"Bella; would you mind paying more attention to my slides and less to Mr. Masen's physique?" Mr. Banner calls, and everybody turns to look back at us with knowing eyes.

I blush scarlet.

I peek at Masen from the corner of my eye to see him smirking.

"Do you always have to do that?" I exclaim, standing.

Masen's jaw drops.

I ignore Mr. Banner's objections and continue on with my rant, "It only makes me hate you more, you know."

It drops further, and now it's my turn to smirk.

"Bella, you just got yourself a detention. Today." Mr. Banner is standing right next to me now.

I wave my hand dismissively, "Mrs. Banner has already beaten you to it."

She's my trig teacher. First period with Leah.

"Well you'll be glad to know that Mr. Masen will be joining you."

I think I'm going to cry.

* * *

_**A/N: **I counted the guest's review as a favorite so here you go.  
_

_No more tonight though; sorry._

_But that doesn't mean that you shouldn't review and favorite anyway._

_'Cause you should. No, really. You should._

_;)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	13. Normal

**Normal**

* * *

When I march out of the classroom Masen is hot on my heels.

"Really?" he hisses, and I don't like the way it sounds.

I feel like . . . I'm being scolded.

And that it's having the desired effect of making me feel disappointed in myself.

And I've never felt that way before.

"You just got me, not only a detention, but thrown out of class!" he states the obvious.

"Yeah like you've never received a detention before . . ." I trail off at the look on his face. "Really? _Never?_"

"Not all of us disrespect teachers. Or our peers. Or everything we set our eyes on."

Way to make me feel like an asshole.

_You kind of are - _shut up.

"I'm was just trying to have a normal conversation with you," he tries to reason.

I'm beyond reason at this point.

"I don't _want _to have a _normal conversation_ with you - and nothing about this situation is _normal_!"

He scoffs, "_Everybody_ goes through this, Bella," he says, and I ignore the fluttering in my chest when he says my name, "This is nothing out of the ordinary."

"I never wanted this. I never wanted _you_," I say with disgust.

It doesn't effect him as I'd wanted it to.

He just rolls his eyes, "Believe me, Swan, you're not the greatest prize either," I also ignore the pain in my chest when he says this, "But, unlike you, I'm not going to ignore the feelings that I have for you."

"Well . . . it's one-sided."

"Can you please stop lying to yourself - I _know _that I don't have to convince you of your feelings for me."

Something in me snaps, and my hand connects with his cheek.

And then mine starts to burn. And then it stings.

And then I wonder if I'd accidentally slapped myself, but the redness on his face - an imprint of my hand - tells me that I didn't.

"I told you that you didn't want to hurt me," he says, but it doesn't hold the arrogance, the self-righteousness that I've grown accustomed to.

It's sad.

"Look," he starts, pulling at his already messy hair, "I'm not going to sit here and argue with you all day, and I don't want you to be angry with me. But . . . Bella," this time I can't ignore the fluttering in my chest . . . or the regret I feel from hurting him, "There's no reason for you to fight me on this. I don't know what you're afraid of, but . . . I'll _never hurt you_, Bella."

I sigh, "That's not what this is."

"Then what is it; why are you so resistant to this, to us?"

He really doesn't know.

"I don't want to lose myself."

"How could you possibly lose yourself?"

He just doesn't get it.

"You wouldn't understand."

"And why not?" he's exasperated now, "Why wouldn't I understand?"

"Because you're not the one who is going to have to giving everything up."

* * *

_**A/N: **You'll have to wait until the next update to figure out what that means.  
_

_There's something that I have to say - some of you have commented and sent me PMs with complaints about the shortness of the chapters, as well as me urging reviews and favorites, and I just have to make sure that you guys all understand the following:_

_1. This is a Drabble fic (which is stated in the summary), so the chapters will always be short._

_I try to make up for this by posting multiple times a day though, as you might have noticed._

_2. If you don't complete whatever challenge I set . . . I'll still update eventually._

_I'm not just going to quit the story because I don't get 10 reviews or favorites right away. Those challenges are just so that you, the readers, can urge me to update more quickly (you'll notice that I've always used the word tonight)._

_I just had to make sure that you all understood that._

_Now . . . most importantly:_

_If you like Batman, Sherlock or Hunger Games fics, be sure to check out my bubs, strixx (who can be found in my favorite authors)._

_Her writing is flawless, her plots are well thought out, and she's really the one who keeps me enthusiastic to write._

_Being a writer is similar to being a chef in that you never enjoy what you've made as much as others do._

_She keeps me confident._

_Oh, and don't forget to review ;)_

_Love you!_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	14. Fears

**Fears**

* * *

"What are you - you don't have to give anything up. Why would you think that?"

I pinch the bridge of my nose. "Of course you wouldn't think of it as a sacrifice."

"I _honestly _have no idea what you're talking about."

The door behind us opens.

It's Mr. Banner. "This is punishment, not chat time. Be quiet."

He slams the door closed.

I roll my eyes, turning back to Masen.

"Please, Bella," his voice is soft, "Tell me what you meant."

"Tell me, Masen," I say, "What happens after two people mate?"

His brows furrow, "What?"

"They move in together. They stop spending time with their friends. Their worlds revolve _completely_ around each other."

". . . Ok."

"What if I _don't want_ to leave my parents?" Tears fill my eyes, and I continue, "What if I _don't want _to lose my friends? What if I want my days to be filled with happiness that isn't only _caused _by you?"

"Bella," he breathes, reaching his hands out to hold my own, "It doesn't have to be like that."

I look up at him.

"You don't have to move in to my house, I could move into yours. You don't have to stop spending time with your friends, and I don't _have _to be your only source of happiness."

"That's how everyone else does it."

He chuckles, "Since when have you ever been one to go along with the crowd? We don't have to do things like everyone else."

_Maybe it won't be so bad . . . ?_

* * *

_**A/N: **Don't forget to follow, favorite and review!  
_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	15. Kiss

**Kiss**

* * *

The thought makes me realize just how close I am to Edward.

His hands are holding both of mine.

We're standing so close that our shoes are touching.

My head is so far back from looking into his eyes that my neck is starting to hurt.

And his lips are coming closer and closer to mine.

No. They're on mine.

First, he just presses them softly to mine.

Then he does it again.

And then again.

And then he pulls my upper lip between both of his.

And then he breathes lightly into my mouth, and I snap out of my haze.

I'm pushing at his chest.

Wait, am I pushing at him?

No, my hands are grasping onto his shirt now, and his are resting on back back.

And I'm kissing him harder.

"Stop," I try to say, but the word doesn't fully form because I'm speaking into his mouth.

He pulls back for a moment to breathe.

"Stop," I actually get out this time.

I can hear how halfhearted it sounds.

_God damn that boy can kiss . . ._

I finally am able to get my hands to push him away, and just as I do the bell rings.

Lunch.

"Don't act like you didn't just enjoy that," he says with a roll of his eyes.

Students are filling the hallway.

I roll mine as well, "Look, whether I did or didn't . . . that's not going to happen again."

I really hope that didn't come out sounding as sad as it made me feel.

"I need to go," I mutter before turning and losing him in the crowded hallway.

* * *

_**A/N: **Sorry that I had to trick you guys like that._

_Don't forget to follow, favorite and review!  
_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	16. Swimming

**Swimming**

* * *

I've only just rested my head on the lunch table when Jessica pops up, "Word in the halls is that you've found your mate."

"Ugh!" I groan, my head shooting up to glare at her. "Word in the halls is you should shut up if you don't want my _foot in your ass_."

Her eyes roll, "Do you always have to be so crass?"

"Do you always have to be so annoying?" I spit, gathering my books and standing.

"Where are you going?" she asks.

"Swimming."

I laugh inwardly at my inside joke.

You know.

'Cause fish can swim away from other fish that they don't like without it seeming rude.

Because they're fish.

And that's what fish do.

But Jessica wouldn't know anything about that.

I bump into Lauren on my way out of the lunch room.

"Hey, want to eat lunch with me in the hallway?" I ask.

"Jessica?" she guesses, and I nod. "Sure thing."

* * *

_**A/N: **I'm going to try to update a few time tonight to make up for . . . what I'm about to tell you:_

_I'm going on a last minute vacation for a couple of days. I'm leaving tomorrow and I'll be back on Saturday. I'm not sure if I'll be able to connect to the internet while I'm there though, so I'm just going to assume that I can't. _

_I will get back to updating as soon as possible though._

_Don't forget to review!_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	17. Bitch

**Bitch**

* * *

"How's your head?" Lauren asks . . . cautiously?

That's means she's trying to have a bullshit conversation.

And Lauren doesn't _do_ bullshit conversations.

"Is something wrong?" I ask.

She shrugs, "No; I'm good."

"You want to ask me about Edward don't you?"

"Don't get mad."

I sigh. "I'm tired of being angry. Knock yourself out."

"I completely understand that you're not happy with this whole mating thing," she states, putting down her turkey sandwich, "But what I don't understand is why you're being like this."

"Like what?"

"Now, you've always been a bitch," she assures me with a smirk, causing me to laugh, "But this whole day all I've heard people saying is, '_Stay away from Swan_'."

"Ok."

"And it makes me wonder . . . is that _really_ the only problem? Are you maybe upset about something else that might be causing you to be _this_ much of a bitch?"

"Nope."

"Oh, ok," she says, picking her sandwich back up.

"Lauren?"

"Hm," she hums through a mouth full of turkey.

"How do you feel about this whole mating thing? I mean your birthday is in two months so you have to be thinking about it."

She shrugs, "I don't really care; I just feel bad for the guy that has to put up with me for the rest of his life."

I laugh.

Loud.

"Could you keep it down out here?" a teacher growls, poking her head out of a door down the hall.

Lauren and I both send the middle finger in her direction.

"_Deten-_"

"Yeah, yeah, we know," Lauren says with a wave of her hand.

The teacher glares hard before popping back into her classroom.

We're quiet for a few moments.

"But seriously, how's your head?"

"Eh, no permanent brain damage."

"I don't think you'd be able to function if you lost any more brain cells."

My jaw drops, "Asshole!" I laugh.

"Bitch!"

"I fucking love you," I say, still laughing.

"I fucking love you, too," she laughs, too, hiving me a side hug.

* * *

_**A/N: **Bella isn't always this much of a bitch . . . According to Lauren. But maybe that's not saying much as they're very alike.  
_

_They remind me of you and I, bubs ;)_

_You guys know the drill: f, f & r!_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	18. Francais

**Francais**

* * *

Seventh period is French class.

For some strange reason . . .

I really don't know why I might think this . . .

But I have a feeling . . .

I open the door to the classroom.

Yup.

That Masen is going to be seated in the desk next to mine.

And instantly I'm think about the way his lips had felt.

And then I feel like a smacked ass, because I realize that in the matter of one day, not even a full day, I've manged to become bipolar.

It's so much easier to hate him when he's not around.

_Would it kill you to be pleasant?_

Maybe if I play nice he'll tone it down.

"Bonjour," I force a smile at him, "Ca va?"

There.

I said hello and asked him how he's doing.

_Do you want a prize for behaving like a decent human being?_

Hm . . . yes.

"Salut. Je suppose que je vais bien. Bien que mon compagnon est d'être un peu difficile aujourd'hui. . ." he says flawlessly.

I don't want him to know that I have no idea what that means but . . . I have no idea what that means.

"You lost me," I admit.

"I'm okay," he translates.

My brows furrow.

Now, I might be the words French student to have ever lived but I know for a fact that he didn't _just_ say 'I'm okay'.

"Sure you did."

Why does he have to make it so hard for me to be nice?

Someone that I've never seen before walks into the class. "I'll be your sub for the day."

_Great._

I get to look forward to forty-seven minutes of Masen trying to convince me to stop being _resistant_.

That makes me really happy.

* * *

_**A/N: **Oh, hey! I forgot to tell you guys! If any of you are interested, I'm working on another story right now that kind of . . . in a very distant way, is related to this story. In the idea, I mean._

_Basically, it's a story about the devil making himself a companion, but his connection with his creation is very similar to this idea of having a mate in this story. But Edward is a bit on the nasty side in that story. And it will hold extremely graphic lemons. Here's the summary:_

**The devil is not an easy man to please. How will Isabella fare in his hands? And what will he do when she is ripped from his hands and brought up to heaven? Welcome to hell . . . AU. Edward x Bella. Canon Couples. Lemons.**

_If you think you might be interested, the title is **The Devil's Creation** and it can be found on my page._

_Oh, and: Je suppose que je vais bien. Bien que mon compagnon est d'être un peu difficile aujourd'hui. . . translates to: I suppose I'm doing well. Although my mate is being a bit difficult today . . ._

_Give me your thoughts!_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	19. Present

**Present**

* * *

For some reason I start thinking about dinosaurs.

I remember that, in this one show, it said that if you stood _very_ still, a Tyrannosaurus Rex wouldn't be able to see you.

And since I'm prancing my way into insanity . . . I decide that it's worth a shot.

I stop moving.

No blinking.

No breathing.

If I could figure out how to stop my heartbeat I'd do that, too.

". . . Bella?" That's Edward.

_Think . . . ice._

"Bella."

_Think . . . stone._

"What are you . . . what are you doing?"

My lungs feel like they're about to burst, and my eyes feel like sandpaper.

He's laughing, "Whatever you're trying to do . . . it's not working. You're just going to end up passing out."

I sneak a breath.

"I saw that."

I exhale heavily.

"Do you want to tell me what that was?"

"No."

I can tell he tries.

I can tell he tries really hard.

But the bellowing laugh passes his lips and I get angry.

"Why are you laughing at me?"

"I don't get you."

"Yeah, well, I don't get you either," I cross my arms over my chest, "I try to be nice . . ."

"That was you trying to be nice? Pretending that you're a statue?"

I glare at him, "That is _not_ what I was doing."

"Then what _were _you doing."

"I was . . . shut up."

He laughs again, "I can tell you're going to be fun; you know, once you get over this problem you have with me."

I pout.

"You're kind of cute, you know."

And then I flush, "Can you stop?"

We _definitely_ won't be talking about anything like that.

Ever.

"Would you rather talk about what we're going to do after school?"

"_I_ am going out to dinner with my parents, and _you_ will not be joining us," I say pointedly.

"But I have to give you your present."

_. . . Present?_

Ifucking love presents.

I peek at him from the corner of my eye, ". . . You got me a present?"

That doesn't even make sense.

This morning he didn't even know that today was my birthday . . . and even if he had he would have been in no position to give me anything.

"Not yet; but I'm going to get you something after school."

"You don't even know what I want," I say stubbornly.

He taps his forehead, "Actually I do."

My eyes narrow, "Whatever; give it to me in class tomorrow." I'm not about to turn down a present.

You know who turns down presents?

Stupid people.

That's who.

"Tomorrow's Saturday."

"Then Monday."

"It's tonight or never." He's tempting me and he knows it.

". . . Fine."

* * *

_**A/N: **Haha!  
_

_Victory for Edward!_

_I have a confession . . . when I was in elementary school I used to do the whole 'stay still' thing to teachers when they would ask the class questions that I didn't know the answer to. For the record . . . it has never worked._

_Tell me what you thought!_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	20. Crust

**Crust**

* * *

"I'm not trying to tell you how to live your life or anything, but . . . it really just doesn't make sense to me," Lauren says, her seriousness almost disguised by how humorous she finds the situation. "I mean . . . The unbearable pain wasn't enough to make you change your mind about Edward but a present was?"

I don't know what to say.

"Bella!"

"I know!" I exclaim but I really don't.

"You don't even know if it's going to be any good."

"Lauren," I say, "I never said that it made sense; I just said that I invited him to dinner. And I haven't changed my mind about _him_ either."

I look over to Angela.

And then I look down at the food-crusted table.

_Study hall in the cafeteria sucks._

And then I look back at Angela. "What's it like?"

"Hm?" She hadn't been paying attention.

"Having a mate? _Being_ a mate?"

"Effortless."

"I don't feel that way."

"That's because you're a difficult person," Lauren says knowingly.

"Hey!"

"Well, it's true."

I look to Angela but she's no help, "It is."

"Don't you ever get sick of Ben?" I ask, "I mean . . . you live with him. He drives you to and from school. He's in six out of eight of your classes. He walks you to every class. He takes you on dates."

"Bella . . . you _can't_ get sick of the person who is your reason for living."

See? I told you that's how these mates are. "I want more in my life then Masen."

"You're still calling him Masen?" Angela asks.

"Yes."

"Then clearly your life isn't changing that much."

My jaw drops, "He's transferred into every single one of my classes, _and _he expects me to just let him move into my house!"

"Into _your_ house?" they both say at the same time.

The male never moves in with the female's family.

"Why not?"

"Do you really want to put your father through you screaming as you're riding Edward?"

"Lauren!" I flush, "What the fuck is wrong with you - that will _never_ happen."

"Don't you want to have children?" Angela inquires.

"Someday," I shrug.

"You do realize that you'll never be able to have children with anyone _but _Edward, right?" she presses.

"What?"

I didn't know that.

"Have your parents taught you nothing?"

Lauren scoffs, "Bella never listens to her parents."

Angela shakes her head, "The nurse probably has a pamphlet or something on mating that you can get."

I grimace. "Yeah she gave it to me."

"Have you read it?"

"Bella doesn't _do_ informational reading," Lauren says.

"Lauren!"

"What?"

"Shut up!"

We glare at each other for a moment before she starts laughing. "Oh, relax."

"I'm going to cry," I drop my head into my hands.

"That'll just make Edward come running here," Angela informs me.

My head snaps back up, "I'm definitely not going to cry."

Lauren starts laughing again.

"Where is Edward, anyway," Angela asks.

"In the bathroom."

"Try again," Lauren says, looking behind me, probably at the cafeteria doors.

"Coming towards us."

"Yup."

_Maybe I can convince him to tell me what he's getting me and I can make something up as to why he can't come to dinner . . . _

* * *

_**A/N: **This might end up being the last one for tonight._

_You know what to do._

_;)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	21. Private

**Private**

* * *

"Did you miss me?" Masen inquires as he slides into the seat next to me.

I roll my eyes to look over at him, "Terribly," I say flatly.

"Lauren," he says reluctantly.

"Don't make the mistake of thinking that I'm going to be nice to you just because you're Bella's mate. I still hate you," Lauren informs him snidely.

I laugh.

_You've gotta love Lauren._

"Lovely," he spits before turning to Angela and smiling, "Angela."

She nods back at him in greeting.

Silence sweeps the table for a moment.

"So . . . will you two be joining us for Bella's birthday dinner?" Masen asks, forcing a conversation.

The way he says it makes it sound like he's a host of my party.

I don't like it.

"Yes," Angela says when Lauren, who is clearly ignoring Masen, doesn't respond.

Silence again.

"Bella, do you think that maybe we could move to another table?" Masen asks.

I furrow my brows at him, "That's rude."

He quickly turns to Angela, "No offense, Angela; I just wanted to speak with Bella privately. Surely you understand . . ."

Unfortunately she does, because she nods her head, "Go right ahead."

I glare at her before glaring at him, "Don't let me hold you back."

"With you," he insists, standing and holding his hand out to me.

I ignore him, "Hey, that table over there is calling your name," I say, pointing to the filthiest table in the cafeteria.

"Bella."

"Hm?"

"You _will_ join me in sitting at another table."

And damn me to hell, because my legs move to follow him.

* * *

_**A/N: **Sorry guys; I ended up extending my vacation._

_I'm back now, though :)_

_Never forget to review!_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	22. Arrogant

**Arrogant**

* * *

Once I'm seated next to him, "What the fuck was _that_?" I hiss.

"What was what?"

"You know _exactly_ what the fuck I'm_ talking about_."

I can tell by the look on his face.

His stupid, gorgeous face.

His stupid, chiseled face.

His stupid . . . stupid face.

"Do you really not know _anything_ about having a mate?" he asks, his brows furrowed.

"Enlighten me."

He doesn't say anything. He just stares.

"So, what . . . you can just _monopolize_ me whenever you please?" I spit.

He remains silent.

"I don't get you."

"_You__ don't get __me?_" he exclaims, griping his hair tightly in his fists.

"You go from being the appeasing, '_we can do things how you want to_', to turning around and _forcing_ me to do what you want."

He breathes deeply.

He rubs his mouth.

"Look, Bella," he starts, "I can be what you need; in fact, I already am," he holds up his hand when I try to intercede. "But I'm only human. And you constantly rejecting me and trying to humiliate me just makes me angry. Now, we can do this the easy way, which would entail you not being such a bitch about absolutely everything," offensive much? "Or we can do this the hard way, which entails me _making_ you not be such a bitch, and forcing you into accepting me. It's your choice."

I don't think I've ever heard a more arrogant speech in my entire sixteen years of living.

I glare at him with a hate that I don't think I've ever felt before, "That was the _wrong_ thing to say."

* * *

_**A/N: **Things are heating up . . ._

_Ten reviews and five favorites will urge me to update again tonight . . . No pressure._

_;)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	23. Self-Preservation

**Self-Preservation**

* * *

"You're overreacting," Masen calls from behind me as I stalk towards the detention room.

"Am I, now?" I call back.

"Yes."

"And why would you say that?"

"Because _absolutely every one_ goes through this, and not once has anyone resisted," he exclaims, and I can tell that his hands are thrown up in the air from the tone of his voice.

"Not everyone," I turn around, walking backwards, with a smirk, "The people of La Push don't have mates."

His face scrunches up, "Don't even bring up those freaks; that's not the point anyway."

"Then what's the point?" I turn back around.

"The point is that _you're overreacting_," he hisses in my ear, grabbing my wrist.

I yank it out of his grip and turn on him.

"I tell you that I'm afraid of losing myself. I tell you that I don't want to lose my friends. I tell you that I don't want my world to revolve around you. I tell you that _I never wanted this_. And what do _you_ do?" I point my finger in his face, "_You_ force me to leave my friends, and then you threaten to take away my freewill."

His jaw drops.

Maybe he gets it now.

"You're not as bright as you like to think you are Edward," it doesn't escape my notice that this is the first time I've ever called him by his name, "And maybe I don't know a lot about this whole mating thing, but . . ." I choke on my words.

Sorrow etches his face, and I can tell he understands now.

"You don't know anything about me; and maybe that's not your fault," I add when I see that he's about to intercede, "But you do know what I'm afraid of, and you knew when you said what you said that it would hurt me. And while I haven't been nice to you, it hasn't been with the intent to hurt you."

"Then what is it?"

"Self-preservation."

* * *

_**A/N: **Interesting . . .  
_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	24. The Packet

**The Packet**

* * *

I'm seated on the complete opposite side of the room as Edward, and I could not be more grateful.

I'm actually happy that I have detention.

Looking at the clock, I see that there's thirty-five minutes left of my sixty minute detention, and I think that maybe this would be a good time to read the packet that the nurse had given to me.

I pull it out of my bag, flip to the first page and start to read.

_Introduction to the Mating Process_

_Though the Mating Process is effortless, it is not in any way easy._

Don't I know it . . .

I skip over the introduction.

_The Superior vs the Inferior_

This is _definitely_ something that I need to know.

_Most people are under the impression that the male is given more power over his female mate._

_This is actually not completely true._

Huh?

_The superior mate is not pre-determined based on sex, but instead it is based on personality, which does tend to result in the male being more dominant, however it is not always the case._

So I could have been the superior mate?

I huff out loud but ignore the stares.

I skip over the rest of this section and go straight to the section labeled:

_The Inferior Mate_

_Do not let your label fool you; you are in fact the more superior mate. _

_How, you might ask?_

Yes, how?

The label is pretty clear . . .

_The superior mate relies on the inferior mate entirely. Their decisions, their thought process; sometimes even their physique._

_Their entire being shifts to be exactly what the inferior needs._

Why isn't Edward getting it, then?

I skip to another section.

_Arguments_

_Arguments are completely natural; in fact, they're healthy. It means that you're communicating._

_But they can also be confusing._

_I the superior changes to be everything that the inferior needs . . . What could possibly go wrong in the relationship?_

_You see, there is a difference between what someone wants and what someone needs. And, unfortunately, they are often not the same thing._

I guess that makes sense.

I go back a few pages to a label that had admittedly caught my eyes.

_Sex_

I look up from the packet to look at those around me.

Is anyone looking?

. . . No.

Except for Edward, of course, but that's expected, and he can't see what I'm reading so it doesn't matter.

I go back to reading.

_Sex with one's mate is nothing short of ecstasy. _

_While one can have sex before their Mating Process occurs_

What?

I quickly look up at Edward, shock on my face.

Confusion covers his as he takes in my features. '_Are you okay?' _he mouths.

I nod and look away from him.

How does that make me feel?

I don't think I like the idea of Edward not being a virgin.

_I _don't want to have sex with him, but I certainly don't want him to have sex with anyone else.

I continue reading the sentence.

_While one can have sex before their Mating Process occurs, it will never compare to sex with their mate._

And that's all it says about sex.

But, really . . . what would you expect from an education packet that's handed out at school.

"You are dismissed," the teacher mutters, quickly gathering his books and leaving the room.

Well that certainly gave me a lot to think about.

* * *

_**A/N: **She finally read that packet!  
_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	25. Try

**Try**

* * *

I'm in a much better mood leaving than entering the detention room, and while I guess that makes sense, I still hadn't expected it.

Maybe I could give this a try.

Maybe . . . maybe it's not as bad as I thought it was . . . or maybe it was worse.

Either way, I'll never know unless I try.

Edward is waiting for me in the hallway. "I'm so sorry, Bella," he breathes, hands holding my cheeks, "I hadn't seen it that way; I was just so frustrated and-"

"It's fine," I cut him off, pulling his hands off of my face and holding them instead. "I know you didn't mean for me to take it that way. I understand now, a little bit better, why it's been so difficult. And . . ." I trail off.

Am I going to do this?

. . . Yeah, I think I am.

"I'm willing to give this a try," I finish.

A smile like no other graces his features.

It's relief.

It's grateful.

It's happy.

"So, since you still have to get me my present," I say with a teasing smile, "Why don't you just meet us at the restaurant?"

"Sure," he says, his smile still in place, "What's it called?"

"Do you know where Bella Italiana is?"

"I'll see you there!"

And he's running down the hallway.

I guess he's not so bad.

* * *

_**A/N: **Oh, what a turn of events!  
_

_Maybe a little information was all she needed . . ._

_You know what to do ;)_

_Oh! And a shoutout to the "Darkward,Possessiveward,Domward,Mobward" community for adding ATG!_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	26. Late Bus

**Late Bus**

* * *

In hindsight, I probably should have asked Edward to give me a ride home.

I fucking hate the late bus.

Kids from every age fill every seat, yelling and screaming nonsense for the entire duration of the ride.

And there is only one late bus, because Forks is so small.

But the little kids never know which stop is theirs, so the bus stops at least a hundred more times than necessary.

"Fancy seeing you here," Lauren greets me, as if this hadn't occurred nearly once a week last year. "What's up with you and Masen?"

"I'm giving him a chance."

Her jaw drops, "_Really?_ So, you didn't give him a chance when he was being nice but when he's a total asshole . . ."

I laugh, "What can I say?"

"I always knew you liked 'em rough."

"That doesn't even make sense."

"Whatever," she says with a wave of her hand, "So I guess that means he's definitely going to be at your birthday dinner?"

I nod, "That would be correct."

"And I guess that means he's going to be sitting next to you," she says.

"I hadn't really thought about it," I admit, "But yeah, probably."

She huffs, "Just make sure you don't forget to tell him not to talk to me."

I smile, "I could never," I say as seriously as I can manage.

"So . . . why the change of heart?"

"I read that packet -"

She cuts me off, "You can read?"

"Shut up; as I was saying, I read that packet that the nurse gave me and it kind of made sense."

"Well . . . Good for him, I guess," she says, utterly insincere.

I laugh. "You know I love you, right?"

"Of course; and you know I love you - even though you mated with a total dickwad -"

"Lauren."

"Ugh," she groans, "I don't think I'll _ever_ get used to you defending him."

I shake my head, "I wasn't defending him."

"Then what were you going to say?"

I rest my head on her shoulder, "You don't hate me, right?"

"I could never," she says seriously, "You're my homegirl."

I roll my eyes, pushing away from her, "You ruin everything."

* * *

_**A/N: **Soon we'll see her second encounter with her parents . . .  
_

_We have an estimated ten chapters left._

_Stay tuned . . ._

_;)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	27. Bombarded

**Bombarded**

* * *

My mother bombards me as soon as I walk in the door.

"Bella! How was your - how do you - what do you - are you - why are you - if - um - how was your day?" she finally settles on.

"Um . . . good."

"Why are you home so late? School ended two hours ago . . ." she asks.

Oh god.

I'm a terrible liar.

I'm going to have to tell her that I got detention.

But maybe if I include Edward I won't get in so much trouble . . .

I gulp.

"Well, I might have gotten detention today for talking in class."

Her face flushes, "Bella, we talked about this," she scolds.

"But I was talking to -"

"No excuses! You said that you were going to be -"

"Mom, I was talking to -"

"- more respectful to your teachers and -"

"Mom! Can you just listen for a minute?" I exclaim, making her stop.

She sighs loudly, "What, Bella."

"I was talking to my mate."

_My mate._

It's weird . . .

It's weird . . . saying that.

It's weird . . . putting a face and name to the label.

I'm not sure how I feel about it . . . but I said that I would try.

"Oh," she breathes, "How did _that_ go?"

And she finally asks what she's wanted to ask be since I've walked in the front door.

But what do I say?

_'Well he kicked a ball at my head right before we mated . . . and then I told him off in front of my entire gym class . . . and then we argued in the hallway . . . and then he transferred into all of my classes . . . and then I got into a screaming match with him which is actually the real reason why I got detention, and, oh, by the way, that's not the first time that I got detention today . . . but then I told him why I was upset when we were kicked out of class . . . and then I almost passed out from oxygen deprivation while trying to ignore him . . . oh yeah, and then I invited him to dinner because he promised to get me presents . . . then he was a total asshole . . . then I read something that made me change my mind about him . . .'_

Yeah, I probably shouldn't tell her all of that.

"Bella?"

Oh yeah; I haven't responded yet.

"He's coming to dinner tonight."

She smiles, "Well . . . that's good . . . right?"

Tentatively, I smile back, "Yeah . . . well, I'm going to go get ready for dinner."

I don't have any homework.

"Okay."

I guess that went well.

* * *

_**A/N: **Let me know what you think!  
_

_Oh, and keep an eye out for one of my new stories; I think that you'll all like it. It's pretty funny: Super White Girl Problems._

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	28. That Life

**That Life**

* * *

_I'm standing in a doorway._

_I step forward onto the porch and see a white wooden swing swaying back and forth in the soft breeze._

_I go over and sit down on it, looking out over the flowered meadow before me._

_Suddenly three people are running towards me; children._

_A little boy, with light brown hair and dark green eyes, and two little girls, one with copper hair and green eyes and the other with brown hair and brown eyes._

_They're my children, I realize. Seth, Leah and Emily._

_"They're beautiful," I murmur to myself, watching as they all run towards me on wobbly legs._

_Suddenly a hand comes down on my shoulder, "Well of course they are," I'd recognize that voice anywhere, "Look at their mother."_

_It's Edward._

_"Bella," he says, stroking my cheek. "Bella," he repeats again. "Bella!" he yells._

I wake with a jump.

What the _hell_ was _that?_

"Bella!" my mother yells from down the hallway. "You were supposed to be getting ready! It's time to leave!"

Fuck; I must have dozed off.

"Sorry, Mom! I'll be ready in five!"

That dream . . .

That life . . .

That's going to be mine one day.

* * *

_**A/N: **What a dream that was . . . Does that mean that she really wants this now?  
_

_What do you think?_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	29. Inner Turmoil

**Inner Turmoil**

* * *

Being that the restaurant is in Seattle, I have time to think about my dream.

Logically, I know that a dream is just that.

A dream.

But a part of me wonders . . . is that something that I want on a subconscious level?

Do I want to marry Edward?

Do I want to have his children?

Obviously not right now but . . . ever?

And why is everything changing so quickly; he's been my mate for all of one day!

Why should my entire life be laid out before me on the day of my sixteenth birthday?

It's too much.

It's too soon.

Edward was my first kiss - how am I supposed to know if I even liked it?

_Oh, you liked it._

But how would I know? It's not like I have anything to compare it to.

And sex! I've never done that.

I've never even wanted to try it.

Is that something that he's going to expect?

Angela and Ben go at it like bunnies; is that what I'm going to want?

I've never had a boyfriend; how does that work?

Will I be clingy? Will he?

Will I wear the pants? Probably not, considering that he's capable of forcing me to do what he wants. But in that case, would he _want_ me to wear the pants?

Not if he wants to get _in_ my pants.

Will I skip school just to have sex with him?

Will I stop liking Lauren because Edward and her hate each other?

Is Edward possessive? Would he keep me from talking to my friends who are boys?

And how would that make _me_ feel?

Would I argue with him?

Would it even be _worth_ arguing with him?

This is too much.

_You said . . ._

I am going to try.

I'm trying.

I'll be nice tonight . . . but I have a lot to think about.

A lot to figure out.

And no more time because we just pulled into the parking lot.

Great.

* * *

_**A/N: **Oh no!_

_Backtracking._

_How will she treat Edward? Will she try communicating or will she hold it all in?_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	30. Distant Family

**Distant Family**

* * *

Have you ever been surprised my how many people there actually are in your family?

Because that's me; right now.

You have your mother, father, grandmothers, grandfathers, aunts, uncles and cousins.

And then you have your great aunts, great uncles, great grandparents, first cousins once removed and your second and third cousins.

Oh, and all of my friends _and _my cousins' friends.

We've taken up the entire restaurant.

It turns out that there are two of my third-cousins with the same birthday as me, so that's why _every one_ is here.

I'd be lying if I said it wasn't awesome.

I mean . . . every single one of these people has brought me a present.

_Hell._

_To._

_The._

_Fucking._

_Yes._

Edward still isn't here though, and I'm not sure if that disappoints me or makes me happy.

I can't imagine that he'd stand me up. What with how hard he's worked all day just to get me to tolerate his presence.

You know what presence sounds like?

Presents.

I wonder what he got me.

What do I even want?

. . . It's kind of funny.

As a child, you want everything in the world.

If someone were to ask an eight year old what they want, the eight year old would never be able to stop talking. As you get older, though, you're just like . . . '_I don't know. Get me an iTunes Giftcard.'_

I have a feeling that Edward wouldn't get me that, though.

"Hey, cuz'," one of my third cousins, Alice, greets me. "Happy birthday!"

"Yeah, you, too."

"Did you meet your mate yet?" she asks.

I nod, "Sure did. What about you?"

"Nope. I just hope he's not one of the homeless guys sitting outside because my prospects aren't too good right now."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, it wasn't a guy at my school, so what if it's an old guy? It has happened, you know."

"Really?" I gasp.

I guess I got lucky.

"Rosalie hasn't met hers yet, either. Maybe your guy could bring a couple of friends . . . hopefully . . ." she trails off.

I nod, "Sure thing; I'll send him a text."

Edward texts me back almost instantly: _Emmett and Jasper will come._

Great. I hate those assholes.

I guess I'll have to get used to them at some point, though.

* * *

_**A/N: **I guess you know what's going to happen with Emmett and Jasper . . ._

_F, F & R!_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	31. A Toast

**A Toast**

* * *

Edward arrives just as we're sitting down to eat, his hands full of presents.

_Yes!_

"Is that him?" my mother whispers from her seat at the table behind me.

I nod my head as I wave him over.

"Well isn't he just delicious . . ."

I scrunch my nose and give her a dirty look. "Really, Mom? Can you not?"

Lauren snorts, "Believe me, Momma Swan; he's not as great as he looks."

Emmett and Jasper trail in behind him, and I hear two simultaneous gasps.

Well . . . good for them, I guess.

Edward takes his seat next to me while most everyone else is caught up in the excitement of Alice and Rosalie meeting their mates.

Once everyone is calmed down, my father rises, tapping on his wine glass of sparkling water with a butter knife.

_Dad's speeches are always epic._

"We are gathered here today," he starts.

What? Am I getting married or something?

" - to celebrate my Isabella's transition into being a woman. As well as Alice's and Rosalie's, of course," he says with a wink in their direction.

Maybe he's talking about me getting my period, instead.

_You're a couple years late._

"Bella has always had a mind of her own. In kindergarten," he says with a knowing smile.

Oh I hate this fucking story.

"While all of the other children were throwing snails at each other, Bella was the one who was going around with an egg carton, trying to save them. And even though she got expelled, she held her ground."

"That's my girl!" Lauren chimes in with a smirk, "Detention buddies for life!"

Some laugh while others shake their heads disapprovingly.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is," he starts getting choked up, "I am so proud of you Bella; you've always done what you felt is right, and have always stuck by your decisions. While some might call that stubbornness, I recognize it as determination, and determination is not something that can be learnt or taught. It's something that you're born with."

Awe, Dad.

"To Bella!" he says, raising his glass.

"To Bella!" the room responds.

"And Alice and Rosalie!" he continues, realizing his mistake.

Everyone laughs. "And Alice and Rosalie!"

* * *

_**A/N: **Only six more chapters and then a three part epilogue . . ._

_Leave your thoughts!_

_ ;)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	32. Presents

**Presents**

* * *

"Present time!" my mother screams, and laughter erupts around the room.

You can see where I get my love of presents from . . .

"Me first!" Lauren exclaims, shoving a tower of wrapped boxes in my face.

I open the first one.

Socks.

I give her a dirty look, "Really?"

"Isabella!" my grandmother chides, "Be nice; it's a very thoughtful gift."

I roll my eyes as Lauren snickers, "Okay, now open the next one."

A book on how to make friends.

Everyone laughs.

"I figured you could use it," she says.

"Bitch." I ignore my grandmother.

"You love it; now open the next one."

I pull out a - my faces flushes and I instantly shove it back in the bag.

That was a bad move, because now it's vibrating.

Edward, Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie, Alice and Lauren - the people who saw what it was - break into laughter.

"Lauren!" I choke.

How could she give me a vibrator? Especially when she knew beforehand that this was going to be a family and friends party!

I shake my head and throw it in the trash bag that I'm supposed to use for wrapping paper.

"That is so rude, Isabella," my grandmother says, trying to reach into the bag and pull it out.

"No, no, it's fine grandma Swan; she's supposed to throw it out," Lauren assures her.

"Oh, okay," she says, though she doesn't understand.

"Keep going," Lauren urges me.

"Do I want to?"

"Yes."

Tentatively, I rip the paper off of her final gift.

_No she fucking didn't!_

"You got me a fu-reaking," I correct myself when I hear my grandmother's gasp, "Ice cream maker!"

"Hel-ck yes I did!" she says, hugging me tightly.

"Okay, me next!" Edward says excitedly.

He hands me two things.

One is wrapped and one is in an envelope.

"Which one should I open first?"

He points to the wrapped present, "That one."

I tear the paper off with a smile.

And then lose it instantly.

_Friends 101: A How to Guide for Dummies_

That's what the cover of the book says.

"Did you all get together and decide to be asshol-meanies?"

My grandmother is seething at this point, but everyone else laughs.

"Don't be so uptight," Edward nudges me, "That's just a joke. The next one, though . . . it's for real."

I look at him speculatively for a minute before I proceed in opening the envelope.

What I pull out is a piece of paper, with a picture of a . . . well, a mansion.

I furrow my brows, holding up the paper.

Everybody in the room gasps.

"What _is_ this?" I ask him, puzzled.

He smiles largely, "A house that my parents and I bought for you and I to move into on my eighteenth birthday."

My jaw drops.

All I can think to ask is, "And when is that?"

I'm one of the youngest in my grade.

Edward is seventeen.

That means . . .

"In June."

Too soon.

* * *

_**A/N: **The next five chapters are going to be very plot heavy . . . just so you know._

_Reviews are like Robert Pattinson . . . in the Dior Homme commercial . . . mouth-watering._

_;)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	33. Overload

**Overload**

* * *

The room is spinning.

My ears are ringing.

Air is coming too quickly but not quick enough.

My eyes feel as if they're glazed over.

With what? I don't know: fear? Anxiety?

Whatever it is . . . I'm going to be sick.

"I - I . . ." I stutter, holding my stomach.

Everyone is closing in.

For the first time in my life I'm feeling claustrophobic.

It's just . . . too much to process.

I can't.

I make a run for the door.

Kate, my cousin, is in her car digging through her glove box.

"Kate!"

She whips her head to the side, "Bella! I can't find your present!"

I can't fucking believe I'm saying this, "Forget the present! I need a ride!"

I throw myself in the passenger seat.

"As far away from here as possible."

"How about -"

"Yes!"

* * *

_**A/N: **Ohhh where's she going to go?_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	34. Drive

**Drive**

* * *

We haven't spoken since we left the restaurant.

We've been driving for over an hour.

I still don't know where we are going, but I can't bring myself to ask.

I mean, it's not like I'm in any danger; Kate's my cousin.

Although it probably would have been a good idea to bring my cell phone.

_It probably would have been a good idea to stay at the restaurant._

But that doesn't matter anymore.

"Bella . . . do you want to talk about something?"

Do I?

I don't know.

Should I?

Probably.

"I just . . . ugh!" I scream, "He said we could do things my way, and then he goes off and buys us a house!"

"What -"

"I said that I would try! I didn't say that -"

"Bella -"

"- I was one hundred percent ready for this!"

"I'm guessing this is about Edward."

I nod at her with watery eyes.

"You and I aren't too close, so I can't say that I understand what's going on . . . but, Bella, I don't think that he bought a house with the intent of hurting you."

"I know he didn't."

"Then what's the problem?"

"That he doesn't understand why I would react negatively to that, when earlier today I told him that I didn't want to move out of my parents home."

She purses her lips, "I can see why you might be upset . . . but leaving your own party . . ."

"You are the one who's driving; you could have said no," I remind her with a glare.

"I'm not one to deny people on their birthday."

I huff. "Where are we going?"

"We are going to my place but I've got to stop for gas," she says.

I look around us.

We're in the middle of nowhere.

"And where do you plan on getting gas?"

"There's a small gas station in La Push; Garrett won't be happy that I'm on their land but . . . a girl has got to do what a girl has got to do," she shrugs.

* * *

_**A/N: **I wonder what's going to be in La Push?_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	35. La Push

**La Push**

* * *

We pull into a gas station that looks like it could be right out of a movie.

There's only one pump which is right in front of a little shack which is obviously this old man's home.

And when he speaks I have absolutely no idea what he's saying.

But apparently Kate does because she says, "Fill her up with regular unleaded."

"I'm going to . . ." I trail off, gesturing towards the ocean right down the hill.

She nods and waves me away.

I kick off my shoes in the sand, stepping forward until the water just reaches my toes.

_What happens next?_

I sigh heavily.

I don't even know what to do from here.

Obviously I'm going to be seeing Edward soon.

And I'm going to have to answer to my parents.

And then I'm going to have to write like two hundred apology letters to the family and friends that I just left behind at the restaurant.

_Ugh._

Maybe I should have just stayed; pretended that my shock was actually a _positive_ reaction instead of a negative one.

But really . . . what the fuck is wrong with this kid?

Does he not listen to a word I say?

"Hey."

I jump, not recognizing the voice.

I turn to see some guy with long black hair and brown eyes.

"Hi," I say shortly, turning quickly back around to face the water, hoping that he'll just walk away.

"I'm Jacob," he introduces, holding his hand out in front of us.

I don't take it. "Bella."

"Swan?"

I turn on him quickly, "How do you know my last name?"

His teeth shine in the dark, "Billy Black is my father; your bus driver."

"Oh."

"So I heard that you're not to sure about this whole mating thing," he tries to make conversation, rocking back and forth on his heels.

"I don't see how that's any of your business."

He grimaces. "You're right."

He looks down at his feet and for some reason . . . probably because now I actually see how much he resembles Billy . . . I feel bad.

"I'm sorry - I'm just not having a good day," I apologize, "I didn't mean to snap at you."

"Do you wanna talk about it?"

"I've talked about it plenty; it's not helping," I scoff, rubbing my face. "I'm just . . . I'm so _tired_."

He nods as if he understands.

"Do you have a mate?" I ask him.

He shakes his head, "Nah."

I furrow my brows, "How _old_ are you?"

"Seventeen."

Huh?

"But your dad . . . he has a mate."

"She's not my mother."

". . . What?" This doesn't make any sense.

He laughs, "I know. It's a bit odd . . . my father was seeing someone before he was sixteen . . . or sleeping with someone, I should say."

I don't know what to say. "But . . . people with the gene can only have children with their mate . . . I don't understand . . ."

"That's only true if both people in the relationship have the gene."

"So . . . what? It's recessive?"

"It would appear to be so."

Who knew?

"Oh."

We're quiet for a moment.

I look back up the hill only to see that the guy is only just putting the gas pump into Kate's car.

God damn he's slow.

"So what are you doing here?" Jacob asks.

"Trying to clear my head."

"Well . . . what's got it so messed up?"

Subtly asking me to talk about it.

_Might as well. Maybe he's got some of his father's wisdom . . _.

"Imagine going from someone whose never even been kissed to someone who is already planning their marriage in a second's time."

"Sounds tough."

I scoff, "That's the understatement of the year."

"So . . . you want to know what it feels like to kiss someone else?"

I furrow my brows.

Is that what I want?

"I don't . . . I don't know."

"Well . . ." he trails off.

I smirk.

I know where he's going with this.

"Let me guess; you'd be willing to give it a try?"

He laughs.

Hard.

"That way you say it makes it sound like I'm an ass."

"What you were about to say was going to make you seem like even more of an ass, so I was doing you a favor," I say with a smile.

Why is talking with him so easy, but talking with Edward . . . is not?

Maybe . . .

Maybe I . . .

"Jacob?"

"Yeah, Bella?"

"Not that I'm trying to encourage you to be an ass . . ." I trail off, unsure of myself.

". . . Okay . . ." he urges, starting to catch on.

". . . Could I take you up on your offer?" My eyes are closed as I ask the question.

He's quiet.

_He offered . . ._

"Sure, Bella."

I open my eyes, looking up into his.

He's really not a bad looking kid; I'm not taxing myself by doing this.

His hands run down my arms, and my stomach lurches.

I recoil.

_What the fuck was that?_

"Maybe . . . maybe you shouldn't touch me," I say tentatively.

"Okay."

He leans down and very, very softly . . . presses his lips against mine.

Fire.

And not the good kind.

The painful kind.

And it's not just on my lips; it's everywhere.

"Agh!" I shriek.

"Bella!" Kate screams from up the hill.

Jacob steps back, "Oh my god; I'm so - what did I do?"

"I -" I choke, "I need to go."

I run back up the hill.

"Bella what did you think you were-"

I cut Kate off, tears streaming down my face, "_Please_ take me home."

* * *

_**A/N: **This is a monster chapter, I know . . ._

_The monster will eat you if you do not review, though._

_Keep that in mind._

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	36. Fight

**Fight**

* * *

We're pulling onto my street now and the fire is still burning my body.

It's everywhere.

My eyes are burning.

My ears ache.

My limbs tingle.

My heart is trying to escape my chest, desperate to escape the boiling blood beneath my veins.

And somehow . . . I know how to fix this.

I know exactly what is going to take this pain away.

Not what, but who.

Edward.

And for the first time ever, I'm relieved to see him. Sitting on my front porch with his head in his hands.

The car hasn't even stopped by the time I'm out the door, sprinting to him.

He looks up when he hears the car door slam, and stands when I'm moments from collision.

My intent is to wrap my arms around his waist, to let his scent overwhelm me, to tame the fire.

I'm never able to, though, because as soon as I'm close, his hand encases my wrist and he's pulling me to his car.

The fire is out from his touch, but it would seem that it never should have been my biggest concern.

Because Edward . . .

He's not just angry.

He's beyond furious.

He throws me into the passenger seat, buckling me up before slamming the door and getting in the drivers seat.

He takes off.

"Edward," I say.

He speeds up.

"I'm so-"

"_Don't_," he hisses, glaring at me with passion that I've never witnessed previous to this moment.

It takes my breath away.

"Did you really think _I wouldn't know_?" he seethes, "That I wouldn't _feel it_ the very _second_ he put his hands on you? His _lips?_"

He felt it, too.

_Shit._

Damn.

Fuck!

"Edward, I-"

"All day, I've fought just for you to allow me in your very _presence_, but you have no qualms giving affection to someone who -" he can't finish his sentence.

His chest moves quickly with his breaths.

"Edward-" I try again without luck.

"_Do not speak to me, Isabella_."

* * *

_**A/N: **Oh no . . . what's going to happen in the final chapter?_

_And then the epilogues . . ._

_We're almost at the end :)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	37. Giving In

**Done**

* * *

I hadn't realized how far away Edward lived from the school.

Even though he was driving over a hundred miles an hour - which I thought better than to ask him to slow down - it still took us twenty minutes to get there.

He's still livid.

I also hadn't realized that Edward was rich.

Actually, rich was an understatement.

From the looks of his . . . estate . . . he could quite literally swim in a pool of his money.

But then I never really got a good look at the house, because as soon as we parked he was dragging me into the house and up the stairs.

To his bedroom.

To walls of his room were glass, looking out over the dark forest.

The only lighting in the room was that coming from the moon.

He threw me on his bed.

And not in a sexy way.

As soon as I was seated he stormed into the en-suite.

I wish I had an en-suite.

_I can't believe you're thinking of this after what you've done._

I've never claimed to be a good person.

_Good; that would have made you a liar._

I look around the room.

It's spacious.

There's a huge stereo in the middle of a wall covered in CDs, across the room from a leather couch where what I assume to be his school books lay.

And then there's this huge ass bed.

The alarm on his nightstand flashes: _11:23_

I don't know where the day has gone.

I lose my train of thought when Edward comes back into the room.

Even in the limited light I can see that he's just as stunning when he's shirtless as when he's dressed.

His anger is gone, replaced by no emotion at all.

His face is blank as he comes towards me.

For a moment I'm worried that he might hit me. That I'd pushed him to the point of no return.

But all he does is pull off my shoes, lift me up, pull back the covers, and then tuck me under them.

And then he goes to the other side to get under the covers as well.

All is quiet.

Until it's not.

"Bella . . ." he starts, staring up at the ceiling, "I know that you don't want this. I know that. I can't say that I understand it, but I do accept it. And I also know that you never wanted me to be the one that you shared this with," he says with a nod of his head. "I've never been nice to you. I've never gone out of my way to be nice to anyone, really."

I try to speak but he holds his hand up.

I comply.

"But, Bella . . . I have _never_ been as . . . c_ruel _to you as you have been to me today."

And there it is.

The truth.

_Fix this._

_Now._

I roll over so that I'm facing him. "Edward, you have to know," I put my hand on his chest, "I hated my mate before he even had a face. Nothing that I've done has been with the intent of _hurting you_."

"Then _why?_" his voice breaks, and a tear escapes his eye, rolling down his cheek.

"To convince myself that I need this - you."

He says nothing.

"I didn't know that kissing him would hurt you."

A sob rips from his throat, and he quickly claps his hand over his mouth.

"I'm done resisting, Edward. I'm not going to do it anymore."

And I won't.

I'm done.

"I know now that I really do need you, and that eventually . . . I'll want you, too. But you've got to stop moving so fast, Edward. I don't know you. I don't trust you. I don't like you," I admit, "But that doesn't mean I never will."

"So you'll really try this time?" his tone is doubtful.

"Yes."

It goes quiet again.

I don't know how long we lay there.

Hours, I think.

But eventually I move my way over to him, resting my head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat.

And when his arms come around me, holding me against him, I know.

Everything is going to be okay.

* * *

_**A/N: **Awe . . . Is that what you guys expected?_

_Are you ready for the epilogues?_

_:)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	38. Running the Mile

**Running the Mile**

* * *

"Pick up the pace, ladies. You're not gonna outrun a machine gun going a slow as you are."

"I don't plan on ever being within a mile radius of a machine gun, but thanks for your concern," Lauren says to General Caius, as he's instructed we call him.

I roll my eyes, and begin to swing my arms, thinking that it might make it look like I'm putting some real effort into this.

"Come on, Private Swan!"

No dice.

I huff and quicken my pace to a light jog.

_I've always known this man is crazy_.

"Don't listen to him, babe, you're doing great," Edward says as he passes me for the second time.

I smile.

"Hear that, General?" I call across the track, "Edward says I'm doing great."

"Edward is also under the impression that the sun shines out of your ass, Swan, but that is the second furthest thing from the truth," he calls back with a scowl.

"And what's the first?"

"That you are even remotely proficient in any physical activity."

That would really hurt if I cared.

"So I guess things are going well between you two?" Lauren asks.

My eyebrows raise, "The General and I?"

"You and Edward, dummy."

I shrug.

"You haven't complained about him in weeks," she informs me.

"There's not much to complain about."

"That's not what the old Isabella would have said," she says.

I shrug again.

"For what it's worth . . . even though I don't like the kid . . . and that it wasn't easy . . . I'm glad you decided to give it a try."

"Yeah, me, too."

It really wasn't easy.

But after that first night . . . things were put into perspective for me.

There's no reason to fight it.

The connection is always going to win in the end.

So I'd decided to just flow with it . . . see where the wind takes me, as they say.

And so far I haven't been led astray.

I wouldn't call it smooth sailing, as Edward has always expected of my transition into being a mate, but it hasn't been horrible.

Edward isn't nearly as bad as I'd thought he was.

Though he does often make an ass out of himself.

Like right now, when he and his groupies, Emmett and Jasper, just finished their last lap, and are dancing around the General.

I never thought I'd see the day when this sight would make me do anything other than shake my head.

But I'm laughing, now.

And I think that it's a good thing.

"Ugh, could you please go put your boy in check," Lauren groans, covering her eyes as Edward thrusts his pelvis.

I smile.

"Gladly."

* * *

_**A/N: **Did any of you notice the double meaning of the chapter title?_

_And just so you know . . . I fucking hate running._

_But running the mile in gym class scars you for life._

_That is if you're like me . . . one of the last ones to finish._

_:)_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	39. The Big Night

**The Big Night**

* * *

_* Warning *_

_This chapter contains a lemon (sexual content). _

* * *

This is one of those things that you don't tell your parents about.

Like, one of those things that girls write about in their diaries.

The kind of thing that you start blushing when you think about.

It's what I'm going to do tonight.

What is it, one might ask?

Since I spent a large portion of the last couple months hearing my friends ask if I've done it, I am more than capable of elaborating.

Doing the nasty.

Bumping uglies.

Getting it in.

Hiding the salami.

Boning.

Getting some.

Getting lucky.

Hitting it.

Getting stuffed.

A bit of the ole' in and out.

Hitting a grand slam.

Or my personal favorite . . . burying the bone.

And now, four months from the day that I mated with Edward Masen . . . I'm here.

In his bed.

Under his covers.

With the lights out.

And his parents out for the night.

"Are you sure?" he breathes against my lips, pausing to roll a condom on.

"Please don't make this cliche," I beg, panting. "Just stick it in there."

He laughs, "Always the romantic."

I close my eyes, bracing for impact.

I've heard that the first time hurts.

Bad.

He doesn't do it though.

Instead his lips brush against my neck, and he trails them down to my collar bone, pressing soft kisses against my flesh along the way. Then, slowly, he moves down to my breasts.

I open my eyes to watch him.

He runs his tongue against the peak of my breast and a tingling sensation runs down to my . . . well, you know.

And then he's sucking.

And then I'm moaning.

And then I'm really, really glad that we waited until a night that his parents are out to do this, because I'm being so loud and we haven't even really done anything yet.

And then he slides slowly into me, and I'm surprised when it doesn't hurt at all.

He pushes and pulls, presses and retreats, and I'm falling.

No, not falling; soaring.

Not soaring . . . coming.

Yeah, I'm coming.

"That's right, baby," he pants in my ear, "Give it to me."

And then he presses harder, forcing me to ride out another wave of pleasure before the first one even passes.

And then he swells within me, and I know he's coming, too.

He drops down onto me, his sweaty head resting on my chest.

I run my hand through his wet hair, holding him to me as I press my lips to his forehead.

My eyes close as I try to catch my breath.

"I love you."

It's quiet.

So quiet that I can't even tell who said it; all I know is that . . . that's the first time it's been said.

I'm about to ask him if that was him when he say, "I love you, too."

And I realize then that I do.

I really do love him.

I'm in love with him.

With Edward Masen.

My mate.

* * *

_**A/N: **Haha who came up with those horrible names for sex?_

_The lemon wasn't steamy, but . . . really, what do you expect from these two?_

* * *

**~ Harlow & Sage ~**


	40. All Worth It

**All Worth It**

* * *

"Why did you do this to me?" I shriek.

"I'm so sorry!" Edward yells back.

"I hate you!"

"I'm so so sorry!"

"I fucking hate you!"

"Baby -"

"I hate you so fucking much!" I scream, squeezing his hand as tightly as I can. "Never again," I promise him, "You will never get that thing near me ever again," I nod towards his crotch.

"Okay, okay; that's definitely okay!" he says, looking at my own with wide eyes.

"Don't look at that you fucker!"

"I'm sorry!" his head jerks up.

"Alright, Bella, just a few more."

I glare at the _other _fucker between my legs, "You've been saying that for the past seventeen hours!"

"Well this time I mean it," Doctor Carlisle replies with an annoying smile.

I'm pretty sure I start crying.

"Come on, Bella," Doc urges me.

"Fuck!" I scream as I push again.

"Alright, I've got the head!"

"Oh my god," Edward breathes heavily, looking nauseous.

"If you pass out I swear to god I'll divorce your ass!" I threaten him.

"You said that when he was going to go to the bathroom, to -"

My glare tells Doc to shut the fuck up.

"I am only doing this one more fucking time!" I say to him before bracing myself.

I push.

I push so incredibly fucking hard.

I think I just shit myself.

"Is she out?" I'm begging.

"She sure is."

And when she's placed in my arms . . . I know that it was all worth it.

Everything; letting go of all of my beliefs of the mating process; letting go of my fear of being Edward's; allowing myself to fall for him, to give my hand to him in marriage, to be his.

To have his child - our child in my arms, our Vanessa . . . it makes it all worth it.

* * *

_**A/N: **There you have it, guys!  
_

_How many of you thought she was reverting back to her old ways in the beginning of this? I have to know._

_Thank you to everyone who has been with me from beginning to end, as well as to those who have jumped in along the way!_

_Make sure you check out my stories: The Devil's Creation & Sincerely!_

* * *

**~ Harlow ~**


	41. Important

**Important!**

Someone is trying to get this fic deleted.

It has not yet actually been reported, but it has been added to a community for stories to be deleted.

I have to be honest and say that . . . I don't really understand it. I mean, there's cussing and a short, non-descriptive lemon but it's rated M so that's expected.

Anyway, if this does get pulled just check my profile for a link to find it somewhere else.

I'll figure it out.

Thanks, guys!


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